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Understanding Relationships


The Hazard of Happiness from Others

A sensation of happiness arise from countless sources like a fresh baked cookie
from a parent, a great nap on a rainy day or the ideal word from the most
important person in one’s life. While not bad in and of themselves, only seeking
happiness from others leads to numerous complications. Romantic relationships
relying solely on one another for any form of validation bring even greater
issues. Understanding the reasons why this viewpoint is bad for the other
person, the individual and the relationship as a whole must be understood before
spotting red flag this reliance has crept into the relationship already.

Reasons It Is Bad for Them

People, even the best and most given ones, do not save other people. Placing
someone in a position where they must sustain an emotional well with the
potential of never being completely filled asks too much of them. This
multifaceted person transforms into a conduit of the desired thing: Happiness.
Consider how two dimensional it makes them. When the transition happens, then
little concern arises for their needs. They stop being someone and becomes

Reasons It Is Bad for You

No one has ever grown, found satisfying love or even a good friend by focusing
on getting something from another person. Even in scenarios where a quid pro quo
exists, the transactional nature poisons one’s ability to focus on sacrificially
caring for the other person because you are not invested in them and their
happiness. Outside of the relationship and the other person, it becomes harder
to grow and experience things on your own due to having this great person who is
there just to make you happy.

Reasons It Is Bad for the Relationship

Think about a spider’s web. No matter how large the spider or intricate their
web, no one has ever witnessed them catching a bird. Relationships are similarly
fragile and sticky. If one person becomes selfish and claims the lion’s share of
anything, the balance gets thrown off and everything falls down. Also, it is
easy for this to become a pattern without anyone realizing. When this happens,
it becomes much harder to break the cycle and move forward. Both people must
seek the other’s happiness and revel in the joy they receive from being with the
other person.

Red Flags of Happiness Dominance

Some signs might peek around the corners letting one know this already exists.
Let’s look at these concerns.
* Swinging Up and Down: Responding overly up or down when receiving happiness
from one’s partner may demonstrate and overly charged link. Variations should
exist in one’s emotions, but it becomes troubling when tied to a specific person
and their behaviors or responses.
* Running Off Fear: Fear within in a relationships is like fast food for the
body. It can be a good short term solution, but things operate poorly in such an
environment. If one only feels the acidic tang on fear when not receiving
happiness from their partner, the cycle may have started.
* Rudderlessness: A withdrawal of overall happiness when not supplied by one’s
partner might create a sensation of being lost. The best way to identify this is
when everything else seems to running well and yet not knowing where to go, what
to do or how one feels overwhelms everything else.
Some of the greatest joy one can feel is in caring for another person and
receiving the care in return. Watch for a growing sense of selfishness and be
quick to talk to each other. This can be difficult for either individual because
the temptation to say this is how love is supposed to be displayed. Healthy
boundaries mean not siphoning off another person or letting them use you for
their benefit. Be partners and love one another well.

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